Ok, quick update because the boss is out for a meeting. If I stop abruptly in mid sentence...it's because she came back, but I'll finish what I was saying later.

So yesterday was a pretty rough day for a lot of reasons. Life just started to catch up to me. It took a few days of slowing down before it caught up, but it did. I got to the end of the line. I've gotten to the point where I just can't take anymore testing and molding and all that. I need a break. Period. The main thing that brought this on was Roomiestar's date...hear me out before you think I'm a terrible friend. Every female reading this knows how it feels when two girls are best friends and ONE of them starts dating someone. It inevitably changes their friendship...not necesarily for the bad, but it just changes. Well...since satan's really been camping out in my mind, I lost it. I started to feel like I was going to lose my best friend, why is she getting everything she wants while I'm losing everything I have, etc. etc. etc. Satan sucks. It took a good hour of crying hysterically, two conversations with Mac and Cheese, a visit with TV Dinner, and finally just screaming at God for me to realize that it really is just satan messing with my head. And I hate it.

Yesterday while I was at work I decided to fast until God threw some big blessing my way...nothing specific...and I don't know what I'm looking for, but I'll know it when it comes. Later on I decided to do it until either that blessing comes OR God shows me what he wants me to do with my time NOW. I know I'm supposed to go seminary when I graduate...but that's 8 months away. There's a lot I can do between now and then I just don't know what. So I'm fasting...and for the first time, I'm sticking to it. I've made it almost 36 hours without food so far, and I'm still kickin. Besides...it'll be a good jump start to losing some weight. ;) Just kiddin.

So yeah...today has been better. I have specifically asked God to kick Satan out of my head at least for a little while, and I think it's working. I'm really happy and excited for Roomiestar although I know there are still going to be times when it will be difficult. But we talked about it, and both of us completely understand each other...for the first time in a while. I've decided that I'm probably going to go see the Narnia movie with the church because if I don't I'll be sitting at hope drowning in my self pity. I'd kinda like to go to the thingy at church before hand but it's 5 bucks per family...which I'm only one person so it wouldn't be fair to charge me the full 5 dollars...but maybe someone will adopt me into their family for the night.

Anyway...I better get going before the Big Boss Woman returns. Please keep me in your prayers and specifically ask God to send me some kind of blessing and to show me what I need to be doing right now. I love you all. Thank you for your prayers and support.

Pepto